When I started this blog a million* years ago, I never anticipated that I'd eventually put it someplace accessible by anyone in the virtual universe.  That's why - for the most part - I don't share the intimate ins and outs of my life on here.  Occasionally, a little nugget of personalization will slip out for the masses, but I try to keep most things on a very long string.  An extra-long string, with some coverage for my personal items and a few turns for good measure.  I'm not stupid.  One day I might be famous (could too happen!) and I don't want anything in here to be put on TMZ.  Oh, stop yer laughing!

*this is an estimate

At least not about most things.  Everyone has stupid moments.  I'm sure Einstein came up with a few doozies before that whole E=MC stuff.  (I can't  figure out the HTML code to make a superscript 2... I bet Einstein could do it if he were here.  You think he was good company? Einstein?  Or do you think he was one of those smart types that was good at pen & paper & math and shit, but couldn't hold a conversation to save his life?  I imagine he liked to talk about himself a lot that Einstein.  He probably had personality disorder.  I could speculate here how much he looks like a homeless criminal from those photos floating around of him, but I've already wasted a ton of time in this blog going on and on about a subject that is both off course and terribly boring).

I'm sorry.  I don't even know where I was.  Oh, yes.  Stupid moments.  (See above). 

Anyway, I'm trying to be grateful this month.  November and all.  Occasionally I write blogs about holidays and the true meanings of them (see my thanksgiving blog from last year - which I could link right here if I weren't feeling particularly lazy and if I thought you would even care to click on it, but I know you won't.  You're so selfish).  Being grateful is so important to being happy.  I know that people (mostly the unhappy, cynical ones) would say "well, what on Earth do I have to be grateful about?" to which I could probably supply a million things - but the key to the grateful/feeling good connection is for you to RECOGNIZE these things on your own, see.  Otherwise, it's just some other person pointing out something and you thinking "well, I'm an asshole because I can't even come up with the stuff in my OWN life that other people can see".  Not that I'm calling you an asshole. You understand what I'm saying?   I know you probably don't, because I'm confused myself and I'm the one writing this garbage. Maybe I should be grateful that you're even still here.

Things have been on a general upswing for me in the past few weeks and I can't really decide if it's a shift in my attitude or an adjustment in the circumstances around me.  And, in all honesty, I think the two go hand-in-hand.  I'm a firm believer that if you change the way you think about life, life will change accordingly.  If you can somehow be happier, then life will hand you more things about which to be happy.  It's so true.... haven't you ever been around someone that just makes a room sorta light up when they walk in?  Or someone that you haven't seen in awhile and then when you do see them - you walk away feeling better & you don't even know why?  Or thinking "man, why don't I see that person a ton more?".  They have a good vibe.  You know?  That's how I'm trying to be.  Of course, it helps a lot that I've stopped worrying so much about other people and have shifted the focus onto myself.... and sorry if you're one of those people who I've been neglecting, but I've been neglecting myself for so long - see.  And that's no good.  Because (important lesson here) - you can't take care of anyone else if you can't take care of yourself.  It's like when that oxygen mask comes down in the plane and they tell you to put it on yourself first, and then put it on someone else that you might be assisting second.... it's like that.  I'm finally giving myself some oxygen. You'll get yours eventually when I'm done breathing some of mine in and after I finish this third bag of peanuts... I digress.

OK.  This blog is getting out of hand.  I blame all the booze I've been consuming today, my post-Halloween candy induced diabetic coma & the fact that I'm going on little to no sleep.  Oh, and I also blame David Petraeus & his extramarital affair...  (this isn't really to blame at all, but it seems to be a good cover for everything else that is going wrong, so I figure I'd throw this shitty blog into the mix.)

So there's the lesson for today, kids:

Be Grateful.  If you're reading this blog it means you have access to both the Internet, a computer and the able-body vision that so many people in this world would kill for.  It also means you aren't dead.  So be grateful.  (Did you know that Michael Jordan was rejected from his school basketball team and then went home, went to his room and cried?  After that - I imagine that he blew his nose, put on his size 14 shoes and stopped feeling sorry for himself.  You should try it). 

While you are here, enjoy these drawings & such that I found in old sketchbooks today.  I decided to take photos of them in case my house burns down and I lose them forever.  Or (probably unlikely) some sketchbook stealing robber breaks into my home and (no doubt out of frustration at my lack of expensive jewelry and major electronics) decides to steal my old artwork in hopes that one day I will be famous.  Enjoy: