I haven't blogged in awhile, and well - I'm sorry. Not for you really. For myself. Because I enjoy blogging and it helps me get out all the inner turmoil and self-angst that plagues my brain on a daily basis. That and the John Hughes movie quotes. "You forgot ugly lazy and disrespectful..."

I'm going through a separation/divorce. It sucks royally. Mostly because it's hard to realize that a person you were with for such a large chunk of your life is actually not who you thought they were... this is especially hard when kids are involved. Really, I give kudos to my soon-to-be ex husband for finally deciding that he had some feelings that existed that weren't blah. But he sure did pick a lousy time to display them to me and my children. I won't get into the details on here - for one, I'm still pre-court trial and I don't want to hurt the outcome. Secondly, it's depressing and chock-full of profanity - not exactly jovial fodder or laugh-out-loud material. Which, let's be honest - is why you come here. Well, for that and the nude photos.

I'm joking of course. I don't post nude photos on my blog. At least not of myself. That would be disgusting and would surely result in a loss of blog-followers. And I only have about 8. 9 if you count that dude in Brazil. (I actually don't know for sure WHO reads my blog, but I can see WHERE my readers come from, demographically. Someone (I'm assuming a hot, tan, shirt-less Brazilian dude) from Brazil reads my blogs. Not sure why. Or who. Or how. Probably that "poverty stricken" kid I send money to every month. Using my cash flow to get on the internet, eh? Poor my ass!). I digress.... (it's confusing when I do parentheses inside parentheses, isn't it? It's like blog ADHD (not that a blog could have ADHD anyway - seeing as it's just words on a screen and not a real human being)). See.... it's awful. I go away for awhile and come back to mayhem and the inability to write anything that makes sense.

Is it wrong that I don't care about politics or that coach that molested (allegedly) children or that Michael Jackson's doctor is guilty of murder or that Ricky Lake may or may not win Dancing with the Stars? I went full circle there. From the structure of our country's political system to a lousy, overrated TV program showcasing lame wanna-be celebrities. I don't care about any of it.

And actually, that's a lie. I do care. Well about the government, anyway. But I feel helpless and insignificant in my quest to make things right. I feel outnumbered. Powerless. It's like that dream where you're screaming out for help, but for some reason you can't project your voice. Actually, it's not like that at all. But I think you understand. No one is going to fix anything in this country until people start actually doing for themselves. Read "Dark Ages America" by Morris Berman. You will want in on my end-of-the-world evacuation plan. You can come to my underground safe house, but you have to bring lots of booze. And I hope you like reruns of Sanford and Son because that show makes me laugh a lot and well, I find Redd Fox a little sexy.

See. I've gone too far. I blame the 20% of Americans. Or wait, was it 14%? Well, whatever. I blame them. And those hippy homeless people in the tents down by the harbor trying to prove a point by living out of backpacks and not bathing. Hey Occupy Baltimore! The pseudo homeless have been trying this tactic for years and NOTHING'S CHANGED.

This is why I avoid politics.

I'm not going to keep rambling on because I find that the longer my blog is, the less time people spend on my page (Hot Latino - I'm talking 'bout you!) and also because my time these days is extremely limited. I've got some laundry to do and some children to tend to and I've got that daily routine of deep breathing to avoid running over the people I hate with my car (if I even had a car - but that's for another time). Thanks for coming back to my blog after all this time. I promise to not wait another 5 months till another one pops up.

And if I don't get back to you, have a great Thanksgiving. Dress up like a pilgrim and make out with your cousin like I used to do in the olden' days.